Be prepared.... I get a little personal here!
And yes, it is long!! :)
NO JUDGING ALLOWED!! :)
So, the Mrs. Texas USA 2009 pageant was two weeks ago!
I had SUCH a great time!
I have to start by telling you that all of that sweat and tears
PAID OFF!!!
No, I did not win the Mrs. Texas USA Crown,
but for me it was something bigger!
I won 1st place in the Swimsuit competition!
I know that at first blush,
this sounds very superficial.
Let me tell you why it is not!!
Since I was a little girl,
I have battled with body image issues.
I know that we all have them to some
degree, but this manifested into
so much more!
I struggled with an eating disorder all through
my high school years.
My saving grace??!!
Austin.
When I found out I was pregnant with my
first beautiful little boy, I knew that
I had to give up my damaging Bulimic
lifestyle, and provide the nutrients
this little angel deserved.
So, to make an incredible LONG story
just a little shorter, I gained
100 LBS in 8 months!!!!!!
That is about 13 lbs a month!
My body went into shock from
keeping the food in my stomach.
SOOOO, along with all the imaginable
issues of gaining 100lbs, I had
stretch marks EVERYWHERE!! :(
My skin stretched, and just never was the same.
I NEVER went back to the Bulimia, but still
struggled with my body and loosing the weight.
For ANYONE out there that has recovered from an eating
disorder, I can not tell you enough what a struggle it
was to not revert to my old ways.
Already having body image issues, adding
another 100lbs doesn't help!!
So, after about 4 years I got the weight off.
Never really worked out, just didn't eat a whole lot.
Soooo, along came pregnancy #2!
I gained 60lbs with this one.
Once again, there I was VERY unhappy
with what had happened to my body.
My skin was a mess. Going from small to LARGE,
to small to Large again was not all that great for me!
After I had Brody, I realized that I was going to have to work out
to get this off.
Well, tried that and was FAILING miserably!!
I was dieting, exercising, and not loosing
a single pound!
After about 3 months of this I went to the doctor.
I knew that I had several health side effects
from my eating disorder, but a new one seems
to pop up all the time.
This time I found out that because of all the strain
I put on my body over the years, my Thyroid
had literally burnt out! It was no more!!
I began medication, and wow what a difference!!
Over the next couple years, I really got into going to the
gym.
I loved Spin classes, got used to running, and started
some strength training!!
All was going ok, until I realized that I had stopped making
any progress!
I wasn't really seeing any more results!
Well, that is when I came across
FULL THROTTLE ATHLETICS!
I was getting ready for this pageant, and new that in order
to even be in any sort shape to compete against these girls,
I needed some serious help!
I knew from my first email from
BJ, the owner of
Full Throttle Athletics, he was the trainer for me!
He was very direct, and funny about it!
So, here I am 10 weeks later!
In the best shape of my life,
and dedicated to my overall health.
Taking home this Swimsuit award was
such an emotional thing for me.
I remember that Saturday morning
before the swimsuit competition standing there
looking at these beautiful women in their
two piece bathing suits.
Some of them have NEVER had
any Children before.
I remember thinking, Jennifer,
You have worked YOUR ASS off!
Just get out there any work it!! :)
When they called my name as the
Swimsuit winner, I was a bit in shock.
You mean to tell me that these 7
Judges that not only saw me in a
two piece swimsuit standing next to
these amazing women, but that also
had to watch me WALK in heels in this
two piece swimsuit thought
I looked the best????
WHAT????
I walked away from this experience
feeling beautiful, strong, and for the first
time EVER, I felt
IN CONTROL of who I am.
I realized that I can feel and look
like whatever it is that I want.
Yes, I will always have stretch marks.
Yes, I will always have skin that is not as
tight as I wish it was.
But I am getting to be ok with that!
I have finally realized that these things
do NOT define me.
We all have our flaws, weather you can see them or not!
I truly believe that GOD urges
us to take certain paths and challenges in life
so that we come across people that forever change our lives.
I remember walking away from Mrs. Texas pageant
2 weeks ago pretty bummed that I had not won the
Mrs. Texas title. And I remember thinking,
there was a reason that GOD put me on this
path. Now figure it out, and move on! :)
So, here are the things that I encountered on this
journey that have forever changed my life!
1, I met one of my very best friends. I could
not imagine my life without her, and feel
as though I have known her forever!
2, I was reminded just how very blessed I am
to have the family that I do. I have such
an amazing support system and and so
thankful for each and everyone of them!
3, I gained a confidence that I NEVER had.
Through the AMAZING support & encouragement
from BJ and Kori, I really got to know what
I was truly capable of. BJ's training helped me
realize the silly excuses that held me back from
having the body I wanted, and taught me to
know my TRUE limits that I was always scared
to push myself to.
They both helped me
realize that the body I thought I wanted, plain, thin,
skinny whatever, was actually NOT the body I wanted at all.
I realized that I want a strong, healthy, toned body.
Not big and buff, but strong!! There is DEFINITELY A DIFFERENCE!! :)
So, this is pretty long, and I will sum it up like this!
This is the only body I will EVER have! It is
ONLY after training at Full Throttle that I now
understand how to look my best.
I will accept my flaws, and ROCK my strengths!!!
THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU
BJ and Kori for Everything!!
On to the next journey!! Tactical Strength Challenge in September!!
I will update my blog as I train for this event!!
God Bless, and get your butts to
Full Throttle Athletics!!!!
You will NOT be disappointed in the journey!
Jen
